" I Don't Know" But I am still "MOM"

The other day I finished with all the registration forms for Ben to start school next year. We have registered for a few schools, since Ben may not get in for a district transfer. We are praying about it and now it is in the Lord's hands and I am not going to stress about it any more!

I have wondered what the kids starting school might bring up with them being adopted. I am constantly trying to "look ahead" and try to get prepared for what might come up and what the kids may face concerning their adoption. I want to have ready answers for them that are positive and helpful.

I was filling out the paperwork and came to the health page. There was a whole section on how the birth was. Did the baby cry immediately, was the baby alert and active, was there complications, was it a c-section birth and so on and so on.

Perhaps this seems like no big deal to most. But for me, adopting through foster care, you have to FIGHT for your children. This to me is the "labor" part. The fighting in court, the fighting for their rights, fighting for their safety and health (since they come from less than healthy situations), and fighting to be the "MOM". The feeling of waiting and waiting and waiting for a judge to call you "mom", even though for years you have been doing the "work" and the "loving" of a mom.

These three children who are in this house are MY children. I AM their MOM! But the state only recognizes TWO of them as such. It feels like I am fighting for my position, to be what is automatic for mothers who give birth. But in my heart and my actions I am the mom. I could not be MORE the mom, if I had given birth to them! So when something like these questions on the forms come up, it reminds me. I... don't... know the answers to these questions. I only have limited information about their birth. And for one I have NO information about the birth. BUT I am the "mom"! I am suppose to know these things. It is a weird, sad, feeling. Nothing that gets me depressed for weeks or anything like that. But right there in the moment, I wished I knew the answers.

When I was turning the papers in, I told the lady at the desk that some of the questions were not answered on the health part. I explained that he was adopted and we did not have a whole lot of birth information. She of course was fine with that and said no problem.

I wonder what things will come up when he starts school. When he gets questions from other kids. I pray that we will be able to make sure they are confident in themselves and how God has chosen to place them in a family.

So even though I may not know all the details that most moms know, it does not matter because.... I am still "the mom".